Givers and takers I’m sure we have all worked with both types in our careers and consider ourselves pretty good at spotting them. But what about givers who present as takers and takers who present as takers that may be a little more difficult to spot? It brings to mind some of the hardnose leaders I have encountered in the Army who seemed to only care about their mission success over my wellbeing but in actuality would give the shirt off their back to ensure that I succeeded or in one particular case give up their jumpmaster duty that would earn him his senior parachutist badge to me so that I can earn mine before leaving the unit, Sergeant First Class Fessey was a true giver that night and the impact still resonates with me. Which are you a giver or a taker? Which is more successful in the workplace? The studies in this book found that givers are both the most successful and least successful in the workplace. Givers are also most likely to become “door mats” that takers use to climb the ladder to their success. The key to a successful giver is to recognize when they are being overstretched, helping others, and setting boundaries so that you can get your work done too and avoid burnout. Givers must give though so don’t cut that off, it’s what gives us fulfillment, and paying it forward tends to come back around. Being a giver is a strength, but some occasions may require us to be takers and the ability to move between the two can be very beneficial. In this book, another style was introduced, matchers. Matchers are both givers and takers and the style they employ will match the style of the people they are interacting with. When I think about it, I see myself fitting into all three types with a heavy tendency toward the giver type. Whatever your type is take the time to understand it and how other types around you complement or conflict with you. Undersetting your operating environment is essential to successful outcomes.
Take Aways
Being a giver is a personality strength that can drive our success by helping others.
Be mindful of “giver burnout” to avoid getting jaded and dampening your giver style. There is extreme fulfillment in helping others achieve success, don’t let the actions of takers ruin that for you.
Know your environment so you can maneuver within. Identify the givers, takers, and matchers’ and interact accordingly.
Burnout is the enemy, take measures to avoid overextending yourself to help others. Set boundaries and time to accomplish your work. The drive to help others can be strong but if you try to help too many people you might help none. You can’t help everyone, but you should help who you can.